Got Grave?: September 2006

"If Geoffrey wins again then I'm afraid I'm just not participating any more."

Argh! Don't do that. Or at least sort your grammar out first.

Life, for them, had always been a struggle.

Scientists believe they are close to developing a memorial anti-perspirant, a man said yesterday. (Source: Ananova)

"I'm going to have to turn my back on you."

Dig this grave.

"No, he tried to hide under here but I wouldn't let him."

Bungle was interred in the Pere Lachaise, next to his dear friend Jim Morrison.

"You know what I wanna do?"

"What?"

"Wait... no, it's gone."

Ted loved Jenga.

"Well, I don't know... I'll have to check the guestlist."

Harriett... you know you can't park here.

At least, until that unfortunate and bizarre incident with the stonecutter.

I don't get it.

"You might as well come out, Geoffrey. We can all see you."

"What? That's not me."

They died as they clad their 1950s semi - crazy style.

"Man, subsidence is a bitch."

"Word."

Et bientot. C'est combien? Je ne sais pas pourquoi. Je suis seulement une pauvre pierre commémorative... et je n'avez pas... les pantalons....

When she discovered she had been written out of 'Great Expectations' altogether, she was devastated. Her fantasies of literary notoriety dashed, she inevitably drifted back into prostitution.

Sadly, and for no reason they could fathom, they were often turned away from hip-hop launches.

The service was attended by family friends the Flowers, the Shovels, and the Crematorium-Smythes.

"Yes, yes, I am He. Do you mind? I'm doing my chanting right now and you are totally obstructing my chi."

"OK, so this remarkable profusion of beautiful natural blooms is all well and good for Gran, but I really feel the tribute is lacking something. I just can't think what. Can you?"